I frosted my tips, rhinestone’d my tees, and got legitimately upset when the popular vote of TRL got the number one spot wrong by giving a NuMetal act the top prize–cue that blockhead Carson Daly quipping about doing it all for the Nookie. I used to be boy band as fuck–thanks to my high school girlfriend loving that shit and me not really having the self-esteem to have opinions/tastes of my own.
I was #TeamJC before the hashtag “Team(InsertTweenDemiGodHere)” was a thing. In an effort to seem cooler than I was, I adopted a third-fiddle vocal group 98 Degrees as my favorite, but if we’re real talking here, I was an *NSYNC frontrunner like the lot of us. JT’s baby blues bling’d brighter than dhose bedazzled bandanas emirite?Continue reading “The 27 Best Boy Band B-sidez (LISTICLE)”
I grew up in Chicago’s West Rogers Park neighborhood, which is predominately an Assyrian, Indian, and Jewish hood, so I didn’t grow up hearing a lot of Waylon, Patsy, or Chris Gains’ alter-ego–Garth Brooks. Thanks to Hulu and a realization that I need to stop re-watching The Wire, I fell in love with ABC’s Nashville. Just like The Wire, the Nashville music scene is a cut-throat milieu where one minute you’re on top of the game and the next minute you’re gun down (well not really, except for that inexplicable time the first lady of Nashville was shot–RIP Peggy Kenter.) Oh and Hamsterdam architect Major Bunny Colvin has been on it too, soooo there, I take it back, the analogy still works!
After one episode of the melodramatic Nashville and you realize it’s ridiculously ridiculous and #SorryNotSorry but I love it. And even if you can’t stand the occasionally cringeworthy dialogue there’s some legit musical performances every episode.Continue reading “Nashville’s Nashies’ Wish List For Season 3”
I remember being 13 years old and completely in love with this “How Do I Live?” Southern Belle. For some reason the song played on my favorite hip-hop party radio station B96. Weird. I rekindled my affinity for the effervescent octave-slayer a few months back when I covered her for Texas Rock Report. After the piece went live, I received dozens of tweets using my words of low attendance against her. The internets don’t take kindly to romantic grey areas I reckon, read more here..
“You can count on one Austinite’s Topo-Chico-warming, breakfast-taco-shoveling-hand, the number of bands that have as zealous a weekly following as Austin’s The Whiskey Sisters” To read more of the review head on over to Tour Worthy.com
This running NBA Draft diary should have ultimately been just live-tweets I tweeted, but I watched the draft on a delay because my cable provider can’t stream my Apple TV at a faster speed than AOL-’96-As-F**k. I stayed twitter dark as to not spoil the lack of drama I wanted to witness for myself.
I used to cover the WNBA’s the Chicago Sky, and the Chicago dudes squad a few years ago, so I am in no way qualified to talk about sports, but that never stopped the internet, so here’s NBA 2014 Draft Diary/Tweet quips I should have made!
1. Cleveland Cavs–they took extra time, to make sure Andrew Wiggins had a work visa, and didn’t have that pesky Canadian sleep-conditions/a case of the chubbies, like last years number one pick Anthony Bennett.
2014-15 Season Expectations: Wiggins Will take his talents to South Beach seven years from now.
2. Milwaukee Bucks- the humble Jabari Parker, said “understatement” instead of “overstatement” when it came to his potential, making twitter overreact as it only knows how–I’d imagine, I didn’t go on twitter. He also gave a shout out to the Great Lakes!
2014-15 Season Expectations: Parker will win Rookie of the Year, and do what most Milwaukee-ians do on their days off, take the train to Chicago and check out the Bubba Gump’s at the Navy Pier.Continue reading “2014 NBA Draft Live Tweeting Tweets Un-Tweeted Blog Post!!!”
“Next up for this near-flawless performer was the bluesy, Adult Top 40 hit “My Favorite Mistake”. Accompanying Ms. Crow on part of her drummer’s drum kit, was the pocket-sized, aggressively adorable five-year old son of Camila Alves and Matthew McConaughey, Levi. This kid had chops on the skins; he stayed in beat most of the time for the three songs he sat in on. Levi’s proud parents danced and cheered him on from the front row and I could only help but wonder, “Is this real life?” Click Here To Read More….
Ahead of the release of my one-“man” podcast “Sweat All The Stuff” in May, I thought I’d #TBT with you an article I wrote for Comedy Of Chicago last year. It’s a must read for anyone considering throwing their Steve-Martin-Fake-Arrow hat in the comedy podcasting/web series ring. Click here to read more!
An edgy buzz phrase that all the kids (redditors) are saying on social media is “Zero Fucks Given“. Other iterations of the phrase are: “Not a single fuck was given“, “I gave none of the fucks“, “Bullshit: 1 Fucks: 0“, “Exactly/percisely no fucks given“, and my own offering to the lexicon of internet speak”I would say fuck you but that would mean I had an iota of fucks to spare–which I don’t because keeping tracks of my fucks would imply that I give a fucks about shit and alas I don’t fucks with fucks-tracking.”
But what if you’re like me and don’t idle on apathy? I sweat the small stuff, worry about nonsense, and overanalyze everything. The concept of giving zero fucks is fucked up to me. What if we all didn’t contribute our fair share of fucks? It’d be a no fucks free for all!!
Let’s take a look at those who perpetually don’t award fucks to anything and ask yourself if you’d like to be in this bad company:
Lululemon, and Abercrombie when it comes to staying in business. YouTube commentors. Those kids on the bus with dat swag who might beat the shit out of you.Continue reading “Should I Give F**ks If Someone Says “Zero F**ks Given”?”
Bing defines a veggie burger as a hamburger-style patty that contains no animal flesh. And that’s it. So if you want to make your own, one must only adhere to that rudimentry principal. Aside from that take all of the liberties and run fucking wild. No one can call you on your shit.
Faux Burgers can range from too South American spicy to too Mediterranean bland. There’s the pre-made frozen variety, complete with painted on grill marks. Some sit-down joints will sling ice cream scooped, bonding agent-less, corn-heavy goop.Continue reading “Veggie Burgers:Russian Roulette Where Every Chamber IS Loaded”