I remember being 13 years old and completely in love with this “How Do I Live?” Southern Belle. For some reason the song played on my favorite hip-hop party radio station B96. Weird. I rekindled my affinity for the effervescent octave-slayer a few months back when I covered her for Texas Rock Report. After the piece went live, I received dozens of tweets using my words of low attendance against her. The internets don’t take kindly to romantic grey areas I reckon, read more here..
This running NBA Draft diary should have ultimately been just live-tweets I tweeted, but I watched the draft on a delay because my cable provider can’t stream my Apple TV at a faster speed than AOL-’96-As-F**k. I stayed twitter dark as to not spoil the lack of drama I wanted to witness for myself.
I used to cover the WNBA’s the Chicago Sky, and the Chicago dudes squad a few years ago, so I am in no way qualified to talk about sports, but that never stopped the internet, so here’s NBA 2014 Draft Diary/Tweet quips I should have made!
1. Cleveland Cavs–they took extra time, to make sure Andrew Wiggins had a work visa, and didn’t have that pesky Canadian sleep-conditions/a case of the chubbies, like last years number one pick Anthony Bennett.
2014-15 Season Expectations: Wiggins Will take his talents to South Beach seven years from now.
2. Milwaukee Bucks- the humble Jabari Parker, said “understatement” instead of “overstatement” when it came to his potential, making twitter overreact as it only knows how–I’d imagine, I didn’t go on twitter. He also gave a shout out to the Great Lakes!
2014-15 Season Expectations: Parker will win Rookie of the Year, and do what most Milwaukee-ians do on their days off, take the train to Chicago and check out the Bubba Gump’s at the Navy Pier. Read More…
“Next up for this near-flawless performer was the bluesy, Adult Top 40 hit “My Favorite Mistake”. Accompanying Ms. Crow on part of her drummer’s drum kit, was the pocket-sized, aggressively adorable five-year old son of Camila Alves and Matthew McConaughey, Levi. This kid had chops on the skins; he stayed in beat most of the time for the three songs he sat in on. Levi’s proud parents danced and cheered him on from the front row and I could only help but wonder, “Is this real life?” Click Here To Read More….
An edgy buzz phrase that all the kids (redditors) are saying on social media is “Zero Fucks Given“. Other iterations of the phrase are: “Not a single fuck was given“, “I gave none of the fucks“, “Bullshit: 1 Fucks: 0“, “Exactly/percisely no fucks given“, and my own offering to the lexicon of internet speak”I would say fuck you but that would mean I had an iota of fucks to spare–which I don’t because keeping tracks of my fucks would imply that I give a fucks about shit and alas I don’t fucks with fucks-tracking.”
But what if you’re like me and don’t idle on apathy? I sweat the small stuff, worry about nonsense, and overanalyze everything. The concept of giving zero fucks is fucked up to me. What if we all didn’t contribute our fair share of fucks? It’d be a no fucks free for all!!
Let’s take a look at those who perpetually don’t award fucks to anything and ask yourself if you’d like to be in this bad company:
Lululemon, and Abercrombie when it comes to staying in business. YouTube commentors. Those kids on the bus with dat swag who might beat the shit out of you. Read More…
Bing defines a veggie burger as a hamburger-style patty that contains no animal flesh. And that’s it. So if you want to make your own, one must only adhere to that rudimentry principal. Aside from that take all of the liberties and run fucking wild. No one can call you on your shit.
Faux Burgers can range from too South American spicy to too Mediterranean bland. There’s the pre-made frozen variety, complete with painted on grill marks. Some sit-down joints will sling ice cream scooped, bonding agent-less, corn-heavy goop. Read More…
(Me and Perez, guess which one of us has a million dollars in their bank account but doesn’t buy shirts.)
“During all of SXSW, you couldn’t stumble downtown ten feet in any direction before hitting a venue that had swore their bar’s showcase featured the future of music and SXSW. Perez Hilton assured me in a brief interview held on the red carpet that his show featured the “future of music”. I have a hunch he might be telling the truth.” Read my full article at the Texas Rock Report
AUSTIN, TX–SXSW is ground zero for techies and fest loving fashionistas. The two ilks have co-mingled and have birthed a hybrid baby. Wearable Technology like Google Glass, or watch calculators are sooo 55 minutes from now. Here’s a few prototypes that may hit the runways IRL in Milan or on the cyber-bohemian streets of the #ATX:
American Apparel’s Pacemaker on Your Sleeve: This is for the emotionally-open elderly who ooze sex appeal. This classic white tee made in an American sweatshop harkens back to the Hot-Rod 50’s where rolling up a pack of cigarettes was all it took to make one a teenage wet dream. This shirt allows rebels with causes–like watching FOX NEWS, and cash’in dem sexy $ocial $ecurity checks–to capture that youthful invincibility, but with a vulnerability you could bring home to mom. PYS allows seniors to roll their fully functional pacemakers in their left sleeve for optimal badass-ness. James Dean, eat our fake hearts out! Read More…
“The venues ceilings vaulted sky high, but some on the ground floor may have been a bit higher. After all, marijuana is the party favor that the evenings headliner is a famous fan of. Credit goes out to the security staff who confiscated more joints and drug paraphernalia, than a Laredo Border Control task force.” For more of my Snoop Dogg AKA Snoop Lion concert review go to the Texas Rock Report